Listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack (for the 672nd time) and drinking the last egg nog of the season I decide that I will write a little something.  I have had a wonderful holiday season and I hope that you can say the same.  Every year that passes reminds be a bit more of what a charmed life I lead...no kids, lots of travel, good friends.  Not that kids are a bad thing by any means but I certainly couldn't do what I do if I had them.  My New Years resolution is simple this year.  Enjoy it.  Every little thing about life.  Enjoy it. 

To that end, here are a few of the things I am enjoying so far in 2013.

1. My mad organization skills...I have organized 3 closets and multiple drawers and cabinets so far and its only the 8th :-)!

2. Learning to sew.  My best friend got me a sewing machine for Christmas.  I don't know how to sew at all.  Nada.  Not even a button!

3. The books of Ken Follett.  If you haven't read him, do it now.  They are marvelously well written with superior historical accuracy.

4. The Les Miserables soundtrack. Seriously, its that good.

5. Saying what I mean/think/believe more.  I tend to take the passive aggressive route in life which usually ends with me feeling like a meanie pants.  So I am trying to just say whats on my mind.  Within reason of course. 

6. Using some of the principles of the Dave Ramsey program to save more/spend less.  Much of what he teaches is good common sense.  But we all need a little reminder from time to time.  So now is a good time to go to TJ Maxx...I won't have been there to get all the good stuff :)

So far I am having fun with all of these things. 

My closing thought...go see Les Miserables if you haven't already.  Best movie I've seen in probably 5 years. And I'm a Twilight fan!

Cheers!

Call it a hiatus.

So.  It has been over four months since I've visited this place.  I have taken a little hiatus I guess you could say, albeit an unlplanned one. 

Coming back from Europe (amazing by the way) I found myself in a very fast paced spanish course to complete the requirements for my bachelors degree.  You will all be glad to know that I graduated with said degree a month ago.  What, you may ask, have I been doing with my newfound freedom?  The answer to that would be a question...who in the hell am I and what I am going to do with the rest of my life...??  The truth is...I'm still working that out.  The only thing I know right now is that I am a registered nurse working in Louisiana in a rural hospital intensive care unit.  In the last year and a half I have been a college student, I moved to a new city, started a new job, had a new title in said job, decided I hated said job, left said new city, returned to old job, old house, old life...
To be frank, I am a bit shell shocked at the present.  Over the last several months (once school was no longer an issue) I have realized that I have absolutely no plan for what happens next.  Once upon a time I wanted to be a nurse practitioner but I did a lot of soul searching and I don't believe that is my future.  Which leaves me back at square one.  What am I doing? Where am I going?

Now, you may say, what is wrong with the life you have now?  Why not be satisfied? Content? Happy to have a good job and good friends?  Well the answer to that is: Nothing is wrong with my life the way it is.  I love where I am right now.  And for now this is where I want to be.  But not forever.  The hard part of all of this is not being where I am.  It's relinquishing my constant need to plan.  To make lists and charts and dedicate long afternoons to internet searchs about my next venture.  

So.  I am not, I repeat am not, planning my next move.  And that my friends is why it has taken me four months to post a blog.  I have spent four months deciding to not decide anything.  Ironic right?? 


I don't know what the future may hold.  Different career, family, kids, writing, travelling, new city, new house?? All are possiblities.None may happen. Or maybe the all will.  And that is the beauty of this decision.  It is sort of like Christmas :)

Since reading and writing are some of my favorite pastimes I am going to use my free time to indulge in these habits. 

Now, a brief note about Europe.  I will likely post more later but here are a few thoughts. 
As you may or may not know, my Europe trip was actually an educational trip through our local university.  I actually received history credit for going and writing an essay about my experience.  The trip was focused on World War II.  That also happens to be my favorite historical setting.  The perfect backdrop for my first European trip (I'm planning on it not being my only:)).  My time in Europe was seriously emotional to me.  Visiting battlegrounds, monuments, cemeteries.  All this in addition to some of the most wonderful museums I have ever had the priveledge of visiting.  In some ways I'm still hoarding the memories from myself only to treat myself to one every so often.  To prolong this surreal experience in any fashion that I can.  My absolute favorite memory?  Top two: 1. Meeting Henri, a child during the Battle of the Bulge and our guide while in Bastogne, Belgium.  2. The Memorial to the Murdered Jews of Europe in Berlin.  Google the monument.  It will take your breath away. 

Au Revoir for now.

In another time.

So...here we are again...a little late :)...I will make an excuse or two this time.  You may know that I am currently finishing a bachelor's degree and this has been finals week for me...in addition to working fulltime (actually a little overtime right now due to a coworker out on sick leave)...and of course planning/packing/preparing for my big trip abroad (I just love how that sounds :) :) )!!
So please forgive me.  I will be on track better once I return from my trip of a lifetime.  Can you tell I'm excited?? I leave in a week.  I am overwhelmed with the nearness of my departure.  It feels like I have been waiting for this for years!! And in truth I kind of have, as I have talked about going to London since I was a small child.  For whatever reason it has always held an enormous appeal to me. 

On that note, I want to mention what has been inspiring me of late.  I have a new obsession with a show called Downton Abbey.  It is a Masterpiece Theater program meaning it airs on PBS.  Who would have thought?? I actually purchased the first season on ITunes and am now on Season 2.  Unfortunately I will be waiting until next year for Season 3 to air here in the US. 

The show spins an enthralling tale of wealthy English family and their lives and also that of the house staff.  It is an eye opening experience to see how far we have come in a mere 100 years.  Truly.  Especially as a woman.  A woman not of the upper class.  I feel very grateful to have come along when I did, where I did, with the parents that I had.  I am inspired by the women before me who have made my life possible.  I am inspired by the men that stood beside them during this battle. 

I hope this post doesn't come off as cheesy but I really do often think of how different my life could have been.  If I had been born a hundred years ago or in another country where women don't hold a place in society the same as that of men.  While there are still things that need to progress in the world of equality, I have to say we have come a long way.  Hundreds of thousands of miles kind of long way.  And that inspires me. 

Unconditional inspiration.

A little over a week ago I promised you a weekly post...and wouldn't ya know it, I let more than a week pass and no post.  I promise to do better from here on out.  I could make excuses, but they would just be that, excuses.  One thing I pride myself on is taking responsibilty for my actions.  So instead of an excuse, here is an apology for my lapse.  I'm sure you were just dying without me ;).

So.  What inspires me?  I have been giving that a lot of thought over the last week and I agree with my favorite uncle that inspiration is the best place to start rekindling my love of writing. 

One of my earliest memories of writing something that I was really proud of involves a paper entitled My American Hero (or it could've just been My Hero...) that I wrote in the sixth grade.  I wrote about my Dad, John Rowe.  I talked about what a good person he was and how he served our country in the Korean Conflict and how he had recently lost his battle with cancer.  I was so proud of that paper, in part because my Mom (or Marmie as I previously referred to her) was so proud that she made copies and sent them out to the entire family.  I know of several other things I wrote about, including World War II and the Holocaust and about the unfair treatment of animals.  Interestingly enough (or oddly enough) most of the things that inspired me in adolescence, still inspire me today. 

So over the course of this blog I will probably mention these things from time to time.  Beware ;)

For now though, I will tell you quite honestly that I am most inspired by the dynamics of a family.  To me a family can be defined as any group of people that loves each other unconditionally.  To take it a step further, this group of people will be the people you lean on in times of tragedy, joy, and uncertainty.  If you know me, then you know I have a very large family comprised of a plethora of different people that I have been lucky enough to pick up along the way. 

One of these days I hope to add to my family...but as I have mentioned to you before I have learned to stop making plans.  This year I will be thirty but I am letting go and trusting that no matter what, there is always family.  They are my unconditional inspiration.

A part of the art.

So...I haven't written in a while.  I guess you knew that though.  Blog envy has taken hold.  The problem with said envy is that it has caused a lack of iniative in the writing department.  A good friend of mine has a supremely cool/trendy blog that makes mine look juvenile at best. So rather than trying to improve my blog I simply stopped writing.  And the fact of the matter is that I didn't start writing this blog as anything more than an outlet to write.  I simply love the way words can be used in a way that allows the reader to completely disconnect from whatever their current reality is.  So I'm done drooling over current popular blogs.  I will still frequent these sites as I love the content but it will be simply to enjoy instead of peering at my computer screen with anxiety and what ifs and the ever present "why can't that be me...?".  *

So back to the beginning.  When I started this blog as I mentioned above it was to be an outlet for writing.  Books have been my greatest love for as long as I can remember and as I approached adulthood I wanted to be a part of the art.  (Yep, that rhymes :)).  Unfortunately, I have been in the real word for so long that I have misplaced the happiness that comes from sitting down and writing for pleasure.  And it shows.  So I'm hoping to reaquainte myself with writing for the fun of it.  And in that process I hope to make my thoughts and ideas fun for other people to read.  So don't expect any fancy graphic designs from this old blog.  I'm just gonna write.  And write some more.  And hope that ya'll take at least a little pleasure in the reading. 

There are a few things that I do need to change to make this worthwhile and to actually cultivate some sembalance of personal growth from the whole experience. 

1. Consistency.  I am going to (try) to commit to one post per week.  We shall go from there. 

2. Readers.  So if you know anyone that might have a vacant ten minute time slot once a week to stop by and read, please do pass me along.  And tell them to give me some (gentle) constructive criticism while they are here. 

So. Wish me luck.  Send some positive thoughts my way as I revisit an old flame (still talking about writing folks).  Have a splendid week. 

*Please note: I do not, by any means, discredit the talent and creativity of real bloggers.  I am simply freeing myself (from myself) of a need to compete.  So blog away friends! 

My few of my favorites: 
Approaching Joy
Young House Love
Breakfast at Toast

A Beautiful Life...

Hola everyone! So I haven't updated you since I recently quit my job and decided to move back home.  Well, that's pretty much all that has happened.  I packed my clothes and my dogs and headed south.  I go back to work at my much loved Homer Hospital tomorrow.  And I'm excited/thrilled/ecstatic about returning to work!  I haven't been this excited to go to work...ever...no I really don't think I ever have felt just like this.  I wake up happy and go to sleep happy and I'm happy all in between.  And its all because of a little town in South Arkansas that I used to dream about leaving.  It's funny how life teaches us lessons.  None of the plans that I've made thus far in life have turned out like I thought.  The wonderful/startling thing about that is that I typically prefer the way they actually turn out as opposed to how I thought it would go.  So suddenly I'm not so tense about the future and planning out the next ten years in extraordinary detail...nope, I'm just thrilled to wait and see what happens.  It's kind of like waiting for the new season of True Blood...I am in eager anticipation.  That said, I don't mean that having plans is a bad idea or that people shouldn't move away and try a new locale.  I am definitely glad to have made the move and still a little sad/melancholy that it didn't go as planned.  I'm also glad to be able to realize the pleasure in just living.  Doing day to day things that otherwise seem boring have a new fun-ness (not a word, I know).  This is not an altogether unknown thing to me, following my divorce (numero uno, that's right ladies and gents, I've made the fatal mistake of marrying the wrong fella twice in my less than thirty years) I found extreme happiness in going to the grocery store or watching a movie or folding laundry.  Everything seemed new and fresh and fun.  And apart from a few bumps in the road since then, my life has pretty much been that way.  I am blessed and lucky and fortunate and so many other adjectives of the same nature. 
It doesn't hurt that I leave on a Carribean cruise next week and in May I'm spending eleven days in Europe.  Yep folks, I'm going across the pond.  I'm running out of adjectives to describe how I'm feeling these days...happy, joyful, excited, thrilled, pleased, ecstatic, jumping up in down/can't control myself....So my plan is to enjoy all of the wonderful things going on right now.  I will graduate with my undergrad in August.  Something I have been working on for quite some time so I'm pretty pumped about that.  I am thinking of pursuing a Master's to become a family nurse practitioner after that but I'm really not planning anything right now.  I am going to enjoy going to the market and watching silly movies and folding my laundry and cooking dinner for my roomies and walking my dogs...well as you can see, I could go on all day. 
So have a beautiful day.  Be happy.  Be positive. Let life happen.  Have a beautiful life. 

Life Falls Into Place

So...my faithful and devoted readers (both of you)...I have big news...I am leaving the big city...sort of.  As you know I was thinking of moving back to to my little Arkansas town this summer.  Well I'm moving next weekend!  But not completely.  I am staying on at my current job but only working one to two days a month and I am going back to my old job (the best place to work ever)! I am beyond happy/excited/thrilled about this turn of events.  As I walked into my current job the other day I found myself counting how much longer I had before I returned to a job that I loved.  I was planning on staying here in Memphis until May because that was when a position would be available for me back home.  God truly heard my prayers this dreary morning because around lunchtime I got the most wonderful phone call I have ever had.  My wonderful boss from home called to say "I really need you now".  It sounded like what I imagine angels sound like when they sing praises in heaven!  I promptly gave notice to my current boss and agreed to come work 1-2 days a month here.  I may decide that I don't want to keep this committment but for the time being it gives me an opportunity to come to Memphis and see my brother and do city things once a month.  And keep my cute little apartment. At least for a little while.  I have missed my little hospital in Louisiana more than I can verbalize at this moment.  I always knew that it was a great job, but gosh...the grass just isn't always greener on the other side of the state line.  So my life will be a little crazy for a while as I adapt to this new plan.  Of course I have a Carribean cruise right in the middle of it all to spice things up :) I leave for New Orleans where I will set sail with my splendid family for a seven day trip in the ocean.  We are going to Jamaica, Grand Cayman, and Cozumel.  And don't forget Europe in May.  I am going to need to sleep half of June to recuperate...except that I have to take French in June to complete my BS degree so that I can graduate in August.  Oh well, i will rest next year, right?  I love my life. Truly.  Doesn't get any better than this.

Even the pups agree...sort of :)